User blog:The not so happy user/(my) TDAS episode 1
Hi guys! I was so bored, waiting for Berry to write, so I decided to write my own season, as KF with the Pokedramon Tour. It's just about TDAS, my version, or what I thought it could have been like, cause we all know it sucked. There are some minor changes in some episodes, and bigger ones in others, but the biggest change will be that three cast members are replaced. In their place, there are put another three, that I find more appropiate. Generations and genders are also equlibrated, so you won't see many changes, but I just hope it's better than the original. START Scene at the prision. Chef and a cop are walking towards different cells, filled up by prisioners. One is the psycho killer. Psycho: I'm innocent, pal! I'm innocent! Cop: *glaring* Suuuure....You just killed three people...anything bad... Psycho: It was self-protection! Cop: You were paid to kill them! Psycho: Self-protection to My boss... Chef: *cuts them* Hey, are you sure that THE prisioner is perfectly sane? Ya know...not out of his mind...Cukoo... Cop: I guess he is, sir. He spent so much time there, sir. Chef: It's been just a year! And he has been able to have hair gel, so I think he is fine... They stop in front of a cell, where Chris can be find in: Chris:*playing with two cookroaches* And RoachJo squishes RoachDj and is able to get the million dust ballls! And this has been all for this season of Total...Drama...Collective Cookroaches! Stay tuned for next season... *finds out that Chef and the cop are there* Oh, well, look who is here...If you have come to beg me to return to the host place, I just can say no! I'm so fine here... I have my contestants, that are even better than the real ones, and even my own Chef! *shows a peanut with Chef's drawn face* I don't need you! Chef: Yeah, however...But I think you actually need to take a look at this. *passes the envelop* Chris: Hmm...what's this? Chef: An envelop. Chris: Dah! I mean what is inside it? Chef: Oh! A brand new contract. The producers want you back for a new season, but I know you'll say no. Chris: Not so fast! Let's take a look at it...*opens and reads* Chef: So, you are in? Chris: To that, I say...GAME ON! *Theme song plays, but a longer one* Chris: *back at Wawanakwa* Welcome, Total Drama Fans! This will be a nex super awesome season with your favourite characters from the different generations! Well, actually, they are some of the contestants that I like the most...to hurt! Introducing them now! From Revenge of the Island, there come: Mike, a nut kid with different alter egos, an old-mad, a gymnast, a womanizer and a tough wild adventurer! *mike gets thrown of the plane, and as he falls, he turns in his different personalities* His nut girl, Zoey, a girl that can be normal and outgoing, but also a complete psycho. Yeah, I know. What a duo... Zoey: Mike! Wait! *jumps from the plane* Lightning: You call that a Sha-Dive? This is a Sha-Dive! SHA- *gets kicked by Chef* OUCH! Chris: Yeah, that was Lightning, a jerky jock who speaks in thir person. Pfft, what an idiot...but hey! He ranked second once... And talking about high ranked... There is Cameron, a stupid bubble-boy, well, smart, but he won...I think we had a weird cast... Cameron: *gets thrown by Chef* This is highly unllogichaaaaaaaaaaaaal!!! Chris: And then, there is Scott, a sharkophobic boy, who, as it's seen, is a speed healer... Scott: No...water...sharks! Sh-sh-sh-sharks! *gets thrown after having hold to Chef's leg* Chris: There is also Dawn, a nature freak, a weirdo aura reader, who knows how to freak people out! Dawn: Ammmmnn...*Chef is grabbing her hair, but she doesn't seem to notice, with her eyes closed, and is thrown to the water* Chris: And, as our last Revenge of the Island cast member, we have Jo, a tomboy loser, who thought she could beat everyone, but was kicked by her own allies! Jo: *pushes Chef* Not so fast, loser! McLean! You are a dead maaaaaaaaan! Chris: And now, let's go to our veteran cast! First, we have our private C.I.T, a know-it-all loser, who beats people with sues. Courtney: I don't like this introduction! Want to see another sueeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!? *gets thrown by Chef* Chris: And also, there is her nemesis, Gwen. A loner goth who likes stealing boyfriends! *Chef throws her* Gwen: I said I was sorryyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! Chris: Then, we have Duncan, the tought boyfriend who the last two girls fought for! So, seriouslly, what do they see on him? Duncan: Not funny. *as he falls* Chris: Then, Heather, the Drama Queen! She's as nasty as a rabid bunny! Heather: I HATE CHRIS! Aaaand...that is a dumb comparation! *she falls* Chris: Then, there is Leshawna, her mortal enemy! A getto girl who enjoys helping everyone! So polar oposites... Leshawna: Just tell me I won't be on her team, this timeeeee! *as she falls* Chris: We have Harold too! A mad skilled dweeb who couldn't be more loser! P.S. He likes Leshawna! Harold: I just wish I went to Triton Steve's merepeople Camp! Chris: And, we have EZEKIEL! This show's favourite freakshow! Everyone in the water: GASP! Ezekiel: GRRRRR! *he is grabbed by the robot's plunger* Chris: Kidding! No way that guy, or what ever it is, is ever joining again! *the robot sends the plunger and Zeke away* AAAAAAAHH! So everyone come to the beach to be able to hear this season's new rules! Scene changes to the beach. Chris and the robot just arrive. Courtney: Chris! Finally! Just tell me with which losers am I competing and for your law security, you musn't put me with Gwen! Gwen: Hey! As I said I'm sorry and...*gets slapped* Duncan: Leave my girl, Courtney! You had your chance to have me, and now it's over! Courtney: Oh, go and F*CK your... Chris: Shut it! Dawn: What I really want to know is if this place has been save from radioactivity... Chris: To answer you, Dawn, yeah, it is. We have spent a whole year cleaning it, and by we, I mean the interns! Zoey: Don't make fun of that! Poor Dakota suffered so much thanks to your stupidy! Mike: Zoey, calm down. please. Don't let Kommando take the control again... Zoey: Oh, don't worry sweatheart, it won't happen! *are about to kiss* Chris: However, as you noticed, you are a mix up of the best contestants from each generation! You are going to be place as your past actions in the show were, as Heroes, or Villains! The cast grins as they look to each other, waiting to discover where they are placed. Anyways, there are some of them who seem to know it already. Zoey: *conf* Oh, I guess I'll be on the heroes, but I don't know if Chris is going to count my Kommando Zoey times as villainous... LeShawna: *conf* Oh, It's better for Chris to put me on the heroes, or he will know how we squish things in the getto! Heather: *conf* Pffft. I'll obiusly be on the villains. Dah! I am the best villain this show ever had! Harold: *conf* Hmm. I wonder in which team will I be placed... Because lots of girls had fall for me here, and girls just like bad boys.... Scott: *conf* Yeah, I'm surelly on the villains team. I mean...It's not a secret that I am an awesome villain, and my strategy is the best one this show ever had! Gwen: *conf* Oh, so bad...I won't be at Duncan's team, and he will have to deal with Courtney... Unless Chris thinks that he is a hero. *laughs* Chris: Ok, at my right, the heroes: Cameron, Dawn, Mike, Zoey, Harold, LeShawna aaaaaaand...Courtney! *they walk there, and smile at their hero status* And, at my right, the villains: Heather, Jo, Lightning, Scott, Duncan aaaaand...Gwen! Gwen: What?! Why am I a villain?! Courtney: Cause you dumped your boyfriend to steal your best friend's one, and that "best friend" was me, Death Breath! Gwen: Dah! He was not your boyfriend! Chris: Sheshhsh! Let me explain the changes! First of all, the losing team will have to sleep at a normal cabin, one that stinks, and the winner will be at...The McLean eco-friendly New Spa Hotel! With awesome cooking, beds, music...*everyone cheers* And that's not all...the McLean Head of Inmunity reappears! Scott: Sweet! Where can I find it? Chris: Oh, safe that for later, Now, follow me to your first challenge... *The teams walk throught the forests of the old island, and some of the teammates, can't evade talking to each other* Cameron: *to Mike and Zoey* Alliance like the last time, right? Zoey: Sure. Mike: No doubt of it, but I think we should put somebody else on, because we are seven, and we could be defeated in a 4-3 way vote... Cameron: Hmmmm...I say go for Harold. Maybe he knows the Freak Glassed Losers' Bro Code... Zoey: Well, we can try... Gwen: I can't still believe that I'm on the villains' team! I'm not evil! Duncan: Oh, no problem, babe. You don't need to be a lam-o-hero, and we are toghether... What else should you ask for? Gwen: Nothing it's your fault. It's just Courtney...I feel bad for her, and she is constantly insulting or glaring at me! *scene shows Courtney glaring* Duncan: Pfft. Then let's just glare back. *he does, and Courtney refuses to watch him* Gwen: *conf* Yeah, Duncan is helping a lot, but I just came here to made things up with her, and I won't give it up! I refuse to believe that we can't be friends again! Dawn: What's the matter, Courtney? Is it cause of Gwen? Courtney: Oh, Dawn, isn't it? Yeah, it's because... Dawn: *stops and looks at her eyes* I know! She gained you heart and then she took your boyfriend, leaing your head destroyed, and making you hide behind your bossy armour! Your aura tells me you are better than that! Courtney: Er... How did you knew that? *conf* Yeah, that girl is weird... I bet I can make my stupid teammates kick her first! Heather: Wait a sec... We are just six villains on our team! And they are seves heroes! Chris: Oh, damn...so you noticed.... I guess you can have the robot. It's my personal assistant, but it will become the first non-human TD competitor! Scott: Wasn't it Fang? *Jo hits his back* Ouch! *the robot hurries to the villains team, and crashes to Heather, and hits her butt* Heather: Hey! Back of, toaster! Robot: Beep-Beep! Chris: Well, you need to go to the top of the cliff. Last one to arrive gets automatically eliminated! They all run, and scene is cut to the top of the cliff, and the contestants start to arrive. Lightning: Sha-first! As usual... Jo: Whatever, we need a camera to check who arrived first. Zoey: Ugh...so tiring... The rest arrive, but the robot is the last one to arrive, always behind Heather, and constantly beeping. Heather: Chris! This thing has arrived last! Eliminate it now, *to the robot* and get away from me! Chris: Woops! LeShawna: What's with the woops, now? Chris: I forgot to tell you that one must stay at the beach... and that I lied respect to eliminating the last one here! *Severall are you kidding me and complains are heared* So, the challenge is a refference to our first episode's and to Broadway, Baby's, from TDWT. It is simple: The contestant must jump from the cliff, dive into the shark infested waters and retrieve a key from there. As you can't see, it's full of keys. Then, you will go to the beach, and jump into a baby carriage, that will be pushed by a team member to the McLean Spa Hotel. You will try to open it using the key, and if you fail, it's next teammate's turn to try luck. So, who are each team's pushers? Jo: I'll do it. Duncan: No, I'll do it! Scott: I was thinking I could do it, so I thought it first! I want to do it! Duncan: With that spagetti arms? Pffft. Don't make me laugh. It's obvius who should push! Lightning: Yeah, Sha-me! Jo: But I always came first at my cousin's babysitting baby carriage race! *conf* Yeah, I was kidding. That thing doesn't even exist, but if Sha-moron thinks you are the champion at something, he will make you do it! Lightning: Forget it, losers! *pushes Duncan and Scott* She'll drive! Heather: So, Gwen. How has been this year? Gwen: *conf* Heather being nice to me? Ok, that's weird...I smell manipulation. Don't even think on it, Old Heather! Heather: *conf* Of course I'm not being ...yawk...nice. I'm just trying to manipulate her. She's weak, due to Courtney's conflict, and where she goes, Duncan follows, so thanks to Courtney, I could win two allies! Thanks, girl! Gwen: It's been...fine. I was just wondering, that we are in the villain's team, doesn't mean that we can't be a good team. We'll play fine, and beat all the obstacles and trials that Chris gives to us! Everyone: Yeah! Duncan: *conf* No way, Gwen... Heather: *conf* ...cause I'm winning this... Scott: *conf* million dollars and nobody... Robot: *conf*...beep... Lightning: ....Sha-stop... Jo: ..Me! No way! Gwen: *conf* Nice, I think I convinced them! Zoey: Who is pushing? I think you should do it, Mike. Mike: Oh, I thought you should do it, if you don't matter... Cameron: I was actually thinking of Harold... Harold: Leshawna is stronger! She's such a strong and hot girl! Leshawna: Thanks, baby, but I think it should be Courtney! That skinny rich gurl showed to be strong enough in the past... Courtney: Meh, Dawn will do it! *pushes her, and she falls down the cliff, to the water, screaming* Every hero glares at Courtney. Courtney: Eh...sorry... Chris: Don't be. In fact, the pusher needs to jump to the beach, so Jo, you should be jumping now. Jo: Grr. Fine! *jumps to the water* As Dawn gets carried out of the water by the sharks, Jo is able to use that distraction to arrive to the beach to, and they both arrive to the baby carriages. Chris: Ok, so you should start! Scott: But there are sh-sh-sharks! Chris: Yeah, and one is a really special one... Fang emerges out of the water, and waves to the cast. Scott: FANG!!!!!!!!!! Heather: Who? Chris: Haha! Just watching their reactions is pure gold...Anyways, stay tuned when we return, on Total...Drama...All.Stars! After the break Chris: Welcome back to Total Drama All-Stars, where the things are getting...sharky. Scott: I-I-I refuse to do this challenge! Do you know how many months I spent inside a box thanks to that shark, over there? Lightning: Oh, you'll Sha-do this challenge, or you will meet "Squisher" and "Destroyer" *points at his arms* Duncan: I think you should start, dude, otherwise you couldn't be responsable of winning for your team! Lightning: Sh-what?! I'll do it! *jumps down the cliff, to the sea, in a perfect diving* Courtney: Well, I go! Leshawna: Wait? Don't you have a medichal condition that prevents you from doing this? Courtney: Oh, that? I was lying to skip it, but after lots of seasons of pain, this is nothing. *jumps* Aaaaah! While Lightning punches the sharks, Courtney gets a key, gets out of the water, and throws herself to the baby carriage. Courtney: Move it, Aura weirdo! Dawn: There's no reason to be that mean...You could be nicer if you just tried to open your heart to... Lightning jumps out of the water and backflis into the carriage, holding a key. Lightning: Sha-go! Jo: And this is how we win! Seeya, losers! *she starts to run, and disappears into the forest* Courtney: What are you waiting for? C'mon, push! Dawn: I'm sorry, but you are really heavy... You should seriouslly need to stop eating your daddy's lawsuit buffet's muffins. Do you know them go to the hips? Courtney: How could you...GRRRR! Just push harder! Scene changes to Jo. Jo: Listen, Brightning. Youd on't like me, and I totally hate you, but we could form an alliance, because we are the strongest members of the team! Lightning: What's to not like? *kisses bicpes* but yeah, I'm in. As long as you don't backstabb me as the last time. Jo: I won't...And technically, you were the one who backstabbed me, along with Cameron. Hey! We just arrived! Pick your key and try to open it! Lightning: C'mon, little Sha-key! Fit, fit, fit, FIT IN! Why doesn't it work? Jo: Cause it's not the right one, Idiock! Get into the carriage and let's go back. Dawn and Courtney arrive, as the others leave, but Courtney's key doesn't work too, so they are forced to come back. Leshawna: There they are! I see them...My turn! *jumps* Duncan: I'll go then. Good luck Gwen! *tries to kiss her, but she pushes him down* Aaaaaa! Gwen: Sorry, Duncan, but let's don't show them any flattery. They have Mike and Zoey to that... Mike and Zoey: Hey! Now we get you're a villain! Gwen: Sorry, I meant...Dah. Forget it, just remember that I'm not a villain *they stare* please? The carriages arrive to the beach, as the two jumpers get out of the water with their keys. Dawn: *sees LeShawna* And I thought that Courtney's hips were big...that's gonna be difficult... Leshawna jumps in the carriage, before Courtney can get out, squishing her, without noticing. Leshawna: Do you hear something? Dawn: No. Maybe it's my breath...I'm tired...Let's do this... Duncan arrives to Jo. Lightning: Ok, going up the cliff to see if I have to jump again later... Sha-bye! Jo: Yeah, sha.bye or whatever. Get in the carriage, Dude-can! Duncan: Haha! Good one! *gets in* Jo: *conf* Wow! Somebody that appreaciates my nicknames? Maybe I need him on the alliance more than I need Shastupid jock. Jo starts running, with Duncan in the carriage, same time as Dawn pushes Leshawna in the carriage, slowly. Leshawna: Can this thing go faster? Dawn: Sorry, it's me...I'll hurry up... Jo: We arrived! Try it. Duncan: Meh, it doesn't fit. Let's go back. Leshawna: *jumps out of the carriage* It doesn't fit. Let's go back! *as Courtney tries to get out of the carriage, Leshawna jumps in, and squishes her again* Let's go, Whitey! Dawn pushes again to the beach. Gwen: Here they come! I guess it's my time now! *jumps down the cliff* Mike: And mine. One, two, one, two... Zoey: good luck! *kisses him* Mike: Bdehehehe...*falls to the water* Gwen: *emerges and sees the sharks staring at her* Heh, easy, sharks. The one that was cursed was Dj, not me... *Mike falls in Fang's head* Oh. Gwen reaches the beach. Duncan: Your turn! *gets ready to kiss her* Gwen: No time! *pushes him* Let's go, Jo! Jo: Nobody tells me what to do, goth-ball! But I'll go, anyways... Mike: *arrives to the carriage* Whoa, what a wild fight... Leshawna: Ok, your turn. *gets out of the carriage* Courtney falls to the floor, really hurt. Courtney: Ouch... Leshawna: Oh, so that's why it went that slow... Mike: Let's go, forget it. Dawn: I'm too tired...can I rest for one turn? Mike: Fine, I'll go. *gets a paddle from a canoe in the beach, and starts rowing the carriage to the Spa Hotel* Gwen: *after trying it* Wrong key. Let's go to the beach again. Mike: *arrives rowing fast* Not this one, going back. *rows back to the beach, and gets a ventage over the villain's* Have you rest enough, Dawn? Dawn: Yeah, I'll do it again. Let's see who goes now. At the top of the cliff: Harold: I think you should jump, Cam. You are so little that the sharks will not even see you! Heather: You are also a skinny nerd! *pushes Harold down the cliff* Haha! Harold: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! *falls in the water, and sharks start to attack him* Heather: Haha! This is so easy...*the robot advances suddenly, and tackles her, causing her to fall in the middle of the shark attack* Robot: Beep-Beep! While Heather gets in the carriage without being hurt much, Harold gets in full of injuries. Dawn: Don't worry, I'll bring you. Scene shows Heather and Harold's keys failing too. Heather: *when she gets down of the carriage, at the beach* So long and good ridance. Jo shows to be visibly tired, after that much rides without a rest. Zoey gets in the heroes' carriage without her falling scene being showed. Zoey: Let's go, Dawn! I think this key is the good one. At the top of the cliff, Scott is holding to a rock, refusing to jump. Scott: T-t-there's no way I'm doing this. Duncan: Dude, it's or you or the robot, and I'm not sure that this thing is water prooved... Scott: Yeah, but it's sh-sh-shark prooved... Lightning: Sha-got you! *Lightning grabs Scott, but he slips, and crashes to the robot, that falls down the cliff* Duncan: Oh, man... The robot falls to the water, and is attacked by the sharks, until it starts to shine and explodes, releasing a black figure to the air. Jo: Who's that... Heather: NOOOO! Every contestant from first generation: ALEJANDRO! Alejandro's tooth shine, and he falls to the beach, and chases a key from the air. Soon afterwards, his legs fail, and he falls to the ground. Alejandro:*conf* Yeah...I guess that after all this time in a robot, my legs will be asleep for some time...But oh, Dios mío! Finally some fresh air... Jo: *grabs him, and throws him to the carriage* Let's go, Saucey! They arrive to the Spa Hotel. Zoey: Wrong one! Let's keep with it! *jumps to the carriage* Jo passes in front of them, with Al. Dawn: Wait...Alejandro? What's him doing here? Alejandro: I was always here...and who the hell are you and why do you know who I am? Jo: No time! Try it. *she holds Al in her arms, and Al opens the door with the key* Alejandro: Oh, Así es como funciona! Chris: And the villains win the first challenge! See you at elimination, Heroes! ELIMINATION TIME! (DAH, DAH) Chris: Hi, heroes! How's everything going? You know you are going to kick somebody, right? Cameron: We do, Chris. How do we eliminate somebody this year? Chris: You just get a picture of the person you want to eliminate and make a cross on it with this pen! Courtney: *conf* I vote for Dawn, cause she's weak...or for Leshawna, because she squished me... I don't know. Dawn: *conf* I vote for Courtney, because she's the most evil person on our team. Mike: *conf* I vote for Leshawna, because she slowed us down. Chris: So, it's marshamallow time! There's one for Zoey, Mike, Harold, Cameron and Leshawna. And there's just a marshmallow left...will it go to Courtney or to Dawn? Heather: Before that happens...Can you explain why we are here? *The villains are shown to be on a peanut gallery* Chris: Oh, yeah...This season, the winning team will have the pleasure to see who's leaving. And now, shut up and let me announce the votes... With five votes, the eliminated is....COURTNEY! Gwen: What? No way! If I came here was to made things up with her! Courtney: Shut up, Gwen! Chris, this can't be happening! Chris: Oh, it is happening, but, before we reveal this season's elimination exit, I need someone from the winning team for a special reward! Lightning: Sha-me! I was this teams MVP! Chris: Ok, then, you are exiled to Boney Island! Lightning: Sha-what? That's not a reward! Chris: Did I say reward? I meant torture... However, Heroes, follow me to the Dock of Shame. Scene at the Dock of Shame, that shows the Flush of Shame with Courtney in it. Chris: Meet "The Flush of Shame"! Heroes: YUCK! GROSS! Chris: You mean awesome! Any last words, Courtney? Courtney: This can't be hapening! I'm gonna sue you so baaaaaaaaaaaad...*as she gets flushed* The Heroes get splashed Chris: Will Gwen be motivated to help the villains be less villanous? How will the heroes go without Courtney? And will Jo and Lightning's alliance reach far? Discover it next time, at Total Drama: All-Stars! Category:Blog posts